Christmas

AS I read on my husbands face book post: he would like to see more than smiles around the Christmas tree this year. Yea, I would have to agree with him. But financially I can only see the smiles so far. But Smiles are a wonderful thing to have when you haven't go much.

Yea it's really been a challenging year this year. So there was a cramp in my Christmas spirit. I was beginning to think that I was turning into scrooge. " buah humbug," I really didn't want to celebrate the holidays this year.

As I was sitting back and try to come up with a few idea's for gifts this year, it hit me. I have a Christmas box in the top of the closet, yep, forgot that I had bough only a few things during the summer. Well turns out that I came up with a few gifts this year and that covered all (9) nieces of mine. so by the grace of God and Good memory maybe Christmas this year will be saved by the hair of my skin. lol.
Still could stand to skip the holidays. So, yes, I'm still ready to close out this lousy year and begin a year with hope, wealth, happiness, love,

But thanks to all our friends(Kathy Johnson, Will & LeeAnn Gragg, My wonderfull friends at work and some of our family we are surviving. For I know God looks out for his own. Maybe this year was God's lesson plan, how to go from riches to poverty or boarder line? who knows what our future holds but God.

So, Greatfull I am to have such wonderful friends and family...So as I tell my husband: No mater what we do it's gonna be what It's gonna be." so each day I wake and try to look at the day in a positive way. Smile at everyone who crosses my path, cry when no one is watching, Pray every night before I lay my head to rest. and love like there is no tomorrow.

Merry Christmas from
My own little world 2009

LIFE'S PARADISE

Well its official, I'm pretty sure this year sucks dogs. Could someone tell me just how to keep the tears from falling down my face. I have come to the conclusion that no matter how hard a person tries, there is never an end to the overwhelming bills that hold us hostage. When your at your wits ends and have nowhere to turn for help, whats next? How do you keep the tears from falling. I am only one person and there is only so many hours in a day to work. so could someone tell me WHY I TRY SO HARD and yet never get nowhere. when the governments garnishes your wages and the insurance takes the other check, HOW ON EARTH DO YOU GET AHEAD OR EVEN BREAK EVEN. We are now approaching the holidays of Christmas..and yet, nothing have I bought. Looks like depression is setting in. Fight it you say, well tell me how you can fight something so overwhelming. Oh sure there is reasons to not be depressed. but come on...we all know this is real life..no stepping out of it now. your in it for the long hall whether we like it or not. Here we are less than 25 days from closing out another year. man, I dont want to look back and remember this year at all. But then maybe I might just learn something from the past to help in the future. Who the hell know.
Sorry folk, this is just my soapbox day. and I'm so sick and tired of being so broke I have to worry about where I'm gonna get the next round of money to buy food or pay bills. This is the only place I can ramble and get it off my brain. AS TO STOP THE TEARS FROM FALLING DOWN MY FACE.

FAITH

Well we've closed out another month in this year, Here we are again waiting for work to happen and still none. seems like we are falling one more month behind. Even though I work, it still is not enough to cover the large overhead that my family has. Yet I still rely on God to help provide. But sometimes it wonder has he forgotten us?

This has been our worst year yet. Very little work for my husband. I just can't seem to get the extra hours needed to help with our bills. Surely something has got to change. I worry and I know I shouldn't, but knowing that Christmas is less than 60 days away. I guess as usual we carry onward on day at a time and one minute at a time. Not really knowing just what the next moment will bring forth in our lives. These are truly trying times in our lives. Just how strong do we have to be to survive the economy. Well guess it feast or famian. Well seems we have to take the hand that life has dealt us. This year has been a true test of our faith. Though I still have plenty left to believe in. This test needs to end and we need an new lead in life to help keep our faith full. May God step up to the plate and fill it plenty!

The Economy

Sometime life really gets to you. The bill are all now due and there is no extra money for anything.. I am not sure how things will turn out, But I feel like I'm going in sane,

I understand the economy is really bad but come on lets get real... How do they expect people to survive on a one income basis... It take two checks now a days to make it. Retirement is for the rich. So sit back all us middle class folks and work your ass's off so you can show that you are worth nothing in this state. Hurrahhhh for the people who get to sit on their buts all day and draw welfare and do not have to work for a living. Go ahead and live off me for a while, I'm poor and I can aford support more than my family on one income... Yet, while I pay YOUR taxes and you get to have food on your table, sure thats ok,,, I'm the one paying for it all. and they telll me I make too much money to get help... Cant quite under stand how that works. Guess I have to just quite my job so I can get by and get a little needed help. Seems like thats the way it works. If you have no job then the state will help you... If you have a job then your screwed.. So weigh out the options... seems you have it better when you have no job... Just cant quite understand it all. I' just really ready for a change... Middle age and middle class really suck. would really love to up in the upper class for a time and just get somewhat ahead of the bill that keep piling up on my desk every day...

Being Sick Sucks

September 8, 2009
I came down with allergies last week. I woke up on Tuesday morning feeling like a truck ran over me. I assume it was allergies anyway. I went ahead and went to work as usual. but I felt really offal. They had put me at the service desk and I tell you.. I couldn't even get the fog out of my brain long enough to think straight. Well finally they sent me home and hour early. I was glad to be off work for the next 3 days. Today is Saturday Sept 12, and I tell you I feel a lot better than I did on Tuesday. Still a little stuffy but better yet.....